A number or years ago, I remember Jason Bateman getting on my nerves. I can't recall why. I just saw the movie "Extract" yesterday and enjoyed it immensely.  Bateman's work in this movie, "Arrested Development" and "Juno" have made him one of my favorite actors. His staight-man sensibility in unusual situations is particularly noteworthy.

If I hadn't seen such riches,
I could live with being poor.

"Sit Down"
- James

Renecked: The Final Chapter

You may remember me nearly being "rednecked to death" last summer while riding my bicycle. The legal process was interesting. I went to the arraignment without my assailant's knowledge. I called the courthouse every couple of weeks to keep abreast of his trial calls. That way I'd know if he ever actually got a trial date. I could be present and testify.  Every time I checked on the trial call, the results were the same. The defense requested a continuance, that is a whiney begging for an extension on the assignment you aren't ready to turn in yet. The public defender called me one night to get my side of the story. There were many, "Oh, is that how it really happened?s" and "Do you really think that was Mr. Redneck's intent?s"  The details I provided in my answers made it clear. Yes, I think redneck's friend swore at me using no uncertain terms as Mr. Redneck narrowly missed killing me with his truck or at the very least challenging me to a physical confrontation he's fortunate I chose not to engage in. My testimony would leave no room for speculation if I were called to the stand.

Within a few weeks of that conversation, the DA's office called and said it was settled, Mr. Redneck had accepted a plea offer. I would not get my day in court to testify against his foolish actions. Where I wondered why he wasn't charged with attempted vehicular manslaughter, his initial charge was reckless driving. The final plea he accepted was "guilty" for negligent driving. He'll pay (or at least is legally required to) a $300 fine plus court costs. My guess is his defense told him of our conversation. In my head, he said something like, "Mr. Redneck, in the time I've been couseling you, I can see your life has been a series of extremely poor choices. Based on witness testimony, this little stunt matches some of the stupidest things you've ever done. I can help you make the most intelligent decision you've made thus far, take whatever plea we can get. Under no circumstances can I advise you to go to trial. It would be suicide"

"Whatever, dude." Redneck muttered.

Maternal Grandparents' Exodus

I meant to write a Summer Chronicle about losing my grandfather in late July, and getting to be with family in Salt Lake in early August. Of course, that entry never came about. Life just keeps happening. Then last Tuesday, life stopped happening for my grandma.

When Poppy died, I was reminded of how wonderful he was. Cliche, yes but very true. As it was noted at the funeral, he was a simple man who took great pleasure in many things. None too extravagant, and none more important than family. When he died, his 5 children, 8 grandchildren and 13 great-grandchildren were all alive and well. I know he died a happy man.

I last saw my grandparents in the summer of 2006. Angie and I were flying back from one of our trips and had a decent layover in Salt Lake. My uncle picked us up from the airport and took us to the house.  We chatted, ate and had a nice visit. Poppy was in a state where he was embarrassed to display his eating skills in front of others. So during the meal, we ate in the family room while he nourished himself in the kitchen. Adding to the challenge of the visit was his severe hearing deficit. He had great trouble in a room full of people. Angie and my uncle orchestrated a moment I'll cherish forever. They kept Grandma busy in the family room while I shared our scrapbook with Poppy in the kitchen. I shared stories, he laughed at the broken nose I received in a play rehearsal. He chuckled, "that must have hurt!". Poppy was famous for always having a joke and he shared a few with me.

As the time to catch our flight neared, we all went to the family room for a group picture. I sat on the couch next to him. As we waited for the others to gather and pose, he turned to me as if to say something. Words seemed to escape him so he turned away, still searching. He repeated this a second time. As he found himself at a loss for words the third time, he made a fist and gently bashed my thigh several times. I knew exactly what he meant and I was that happy too.

Poppy had struggled with health issues for almost 10 years. We obviously knew he'd go someday, but we always joked Bill and Evelyn would never dye, both living just to spite the other. So on that final visit, I felt like I may never see him again and enjoyed it accordingly. I incorrectly assumed I'd have more time with Grandma.

Since the visit, their health both slipped pretty quickly. Grandma wrestled with dementia and had to go to a home. Poppy finally went to a facility to stabilize him. The hope was he'd recover and go back. But taking him out of his house and away from his cats really shortened any hope of longevity. Within weeks, he surrendered.

The funeral was amazing. Most of the family came. I was a pallbearer and there was a Navy ceremony since he served in Pearl Harbor. If you thought for a second I wasn't going to cry, think about that last part again. Pearl Harbor, 1941. I don't have the words.

When we got back to Alaska, my friends cheered me up as best they could. Many of the finest assorted teas I've every had were waiting for me in a package on the porch. Thanks for being so thoughtful, guys.

During that visit we debated to go see Grandma in the home. I opted out, knowing she'd forget the visit and I'd rather remember her the way she was last time I saw her. Now that she's gone, I know I made the right decision. Family seems to think she didn't understand much anymore and never understood Poppy was gone. I think she knew on some level. I think she understands she won the spiteful battle of life with Poppy. She won by less than 5 months. They were together 67 years. He was 92 and she was 89. The irony of her not making it half a year without him is not lost on me.  I'll let Ben Folds take it from here.

Next door there's an old man who lived to his nineties
And one day passed away in his sleep
And his wife; she stayed for a couple of days
And passed away
I'm sorry, I know that's a strange way to tell you that I know we belong
That I know
That I am
I am
I am
The luckiest

Thanksgiving

As Thanksgiving came and went this year, I had a lot to be thankful for.  This could be a really sappy post if I went on and on about how lovely my wife is and what a fortuitous marriage I have or my gifts as an actor and the wonderful opportunities they've given me in community theatre. 

So rather than carrying on about how grateful I am for things I could ramble about, I want to mention a few little things and then expand on just one (which may seem like an odd one).

I'm thankful for being such a young person who has taken drastic measures toward being financially independent.  I see so many people in their 50's who've done nothing tangible to get out of debt or retire.  Ever.  Dying with a job and debt on their plates is something they've simply accepted because they were never taught sound, executable strategies.  The good news for them is professionals like myself can still help them set and achieve goals they never thought possible.  It's not too late for them.  Clearly it would be way easier if they had started younger, but they can still be financially secure without greeting at WalMart and being trampled to death by crazed shoppers on Black Friday.  So I'm thankful to have put myself in a better situation by starting so young, and for the ability to help others in their situations.

I appreciate people I barely know or don't even know at all stopping me in public to share with me how much they enjoy my work on the stage.

I was deeply touched by the comments my editor published in her newspaper's Thanksgiving edition.  All I thought I'd done for her is sell a few ads. She thanked "the eternally upbeat Jamie Nelson, who is never in a bad mood, never lacking optimism and never has a bad thing to say about anyone, or if he does, it comes off as constructive criticism." Sometimes you don't have any idea what effect you have on people, so I'm flattered to have been called out. I'll strive to live up to these kind words.

My beloved Shelby which my thoughtful wife gave to me for my 30th birthday.  That stupid dog is always there to nudge my arm and tell me to say, "the hell with allergies, we're alive today and we should cuddle, play and just run around like idiots."

Green tea (or all other teas for that matter) and its ability to make great moments finer, and tough ones more palatable.

The special relationship I've developed with my grandmother who celebrated her 90th birthday on turkey day. Even my dad marvels at how she and I can sit around and talk for hours when other people make her nervous or bored. I've come to realize, she sheltered herself from love after her husband died because she never wanted to be hurt like that again. I like to think I taught her to love again and added some good years to her life.

The stupid, addictive internet.  I finally caved and got a damn FaceBook account.  Within 24 hours I had dozens of "friends" and got to "see" so many of the beautiful people I've been so blessed to know over the years.  I'm thankful for all of them.

Now for the verbose.  I love the Wii Fit.  It's certainly not the greatest invention ever. It's does not lead to me getting the most exercise I ever have. But it's right there in the living room, and easy to do every day. I don't have to work up the courage to bike in freezing rain, gear up to cross-country ski when it's 10 below, drive to the gym or tennis court or put on sunscreen. I just pick up the remote, and there's my virtual trainer.  My weight and BMI (body mass index) are measured and charted to show progress.  There are balance games, yoga poses and strength or aerobic exercises. It never really seems to be much on any given day, but because I stick with it, I'm 10 pounds lighter than I've been in any other November in Alaska.  I'm even 20 pounds lighter than my 1st Alaskan November.  Not only do I feel great, but I was comfortable doing my first-ever underwear scene in Cuckoo's Nest.  I even had a few people tell me I looked good or even "toned" on stage.  So I'm thankful for the Wii Fit which Angie and I gave each other this summer for our anniversary.  And for my healthy physique.  As I celebrated my 33rd birthday this month, I really didn't feel old at all.

I'm thankful for all of you guys.  I love you and hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving.